A lot can happen in class. It can build you up, leave you on a ballet high, make you dream big, and then just as quick as it put you there it can drop you just like that.
When I turned up for class this week I was feeling pretty good.
An hour later I wanted to hide in the corner.
Here’s how to go from Prima Ballerina to Wannabe Idiot in 60 minutes.
- Find out you can dress as a Swan in your school’s annual show.
- Get super excited about performing your mini Act 4 from Swan Lake.
- Wake up the next day still excited.
- Spend all of next day wondering if you should go all out and be brave by resurrecting your variation of Odette’s Variation.
- Re-choreograph your steps/modify to improve while listening to the music approx. 396,076 times on the way home from work.
- Get really excited. REALLY excited.
- Spend the rest of the time until next class imagining your performance.
- Turn up to said class looking like you stepped off the ‘Black Swan’ film set.
- Feel alright while rocking the ‘romantic’ ballet look.
- Watch yourself in the mirror trying to convince yourself that people don’t think you look like an idiot in pink as you are no longer five years old OR have a ballerina sized bottom.
- Start to think pink is definitely not flattering on you.
- Get your ballet teacher to make you do doubles/multiples/whatever you are not very strong at while half the class watches.
- Fail at said exercise.
- Begin to wonder what on earth you were thinking when you thought you could pull off a solo.
- Now struggle to get the combination right.
- Lame Ducks Suck.
- Have a major wobble-turn-off-balance-thing en pointe which happens in such slow motion so that you see your teacher run to try and catch you.
- Above point must happen in front of entire class as you’re are going from the corner!
- Think yourself lucky that you didn’t fall flat on your face and that your arms managed to finish in a nice arabesque position.
- Get coat on quietly in corner.
- Remember that you look a bit silly in your pink skirt.
- Leave studio feeling like a complete idiot.
- Wear black to next class and pretend that no Lame Duck/Multiple turn is going to get the better of you.
- Get all Odile/Black Swan on doubt’s skinny little ballerina ass.
- (Maybe even start to imagine that solo again?)